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GENDER DIFFERENCES

"Facing Off" with the LOVE ABLE SELF

helenAnthropologist Helen Fisher studies gender differences and the evolution of human emotions.
She's best known as an expert on romantic love, and her beautifully penned books -- including Anatomy of Love and Why We Love -- lay bare the mysteries of our most treasured emotion.

In this recent lecture anthropologist Helen questions us and discusses love.

Why do we crave love so much, even to the point that we would die for it?

To learn more about our very real, very physical need for romantic love, Helen Fisher and her research team took MRIs of people in love -- and people who had just been dumped.

This makes for some very interesting primal, organic, biological questioning and most definitely sheds more light and knowledge into our basic need for a mate to share the intimacy associated with the highest prize of relationship.

Embedded deeply within the oldest part of the serpentine brain below the cognitive logical region and then beneath the limbic or emotional schema lies a distinct portal of primal need.

As with all other physiological needs of the body lies the ever vigilant, esteem founding, need for love, for safe loving association and then also for a mate.

Helen offers a neat pair of concluding photos in this video to illustrate how best of male mates "face away" from each other, avoiding looking into each others eyes, where as women comfortably sit face to face maybe because as she suggest after many thousands of years of emotionally communicating with and facing the childen they nurtured.


So in our single or couples relationship therapy at Bondi Junction Counselling Service we often encourage and introduce small experiments to study exactly what our clients notice right in that moment, as we revisit and study tiny expressive glimpses which we notice our clients unconcsiously avoiding or passing over quickly, most possibly because they sense they would become disturbed and upset if they "went there".

So for some reason they learned to believe its NOT OK or they should avoid being sad, hurt or angry and so they simply "Don't go there" because it's painful.

Our therapy is established by experiencing and gently studying these tiny moments and sensations which we can then relate to and gatherer some understanding about how and why our clients established a particular belief.

Once we have uncovered some meaning about this avoidance experience we then become able to change the way these habitual impulses occur as they may continue to effect and influence us some times many years after their founding.

Life is too good to waste being sad, hurt, wounded alone and unhappy and not understanding why this is happening, call us on 93877355 or email us for non judgemental loving support, and healing to release yourself from old habitual conditioned self imprisonment with the wonderful opportunity and potential of self released freedom to be your LOVE ABLE SELF.

See Helen Fischer TED talk on LOVE

 

 

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